Elder David A. Bednar of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles has taught: “Many of our memorable and enduring Christmas traditions include different kinds of lights—lights on trees, lights in and on our homes, candles on our tables. May the beautiful lights of every holiday season remind us of Him who is the source of all light.”
We had 3 distinct experiences with beautiful light displays leading up to Christmas, and we wanted to share some of that beauty with you.
First, we were invited to attend a Christmas gathering by one of our MyBaby4Me partners here in Memphis. Their office is located in the Crosstown Concourse in Memphis (which has an interesting history of it's own (What's Inside And Around The Crosstown Concourse? | I Love Memphis (ilovememphisblog.com). The open house at their office was associated with the "lighting" of the atrium of the building. We stepped out of their office onto a terrace overlooking the crowd and in one breathtaking instant, the entire space was filled with light and joy and the music of Christmas.
Our second joyful lights display included a surprise we planned for the other 2 senior missionary couples serving here in Memphis. We rented a minivan for the night, picked them up and enjoyed dinner together and then drive to Shelby Farms for their Starry Nights 1.5 mile drive-thru light display. We had enjoyed this particular experience last year at Christmas, but it was the first time the other two couples had experienced it. It was a great joy to watch their wonder at every turn of the road and with every new work of light and color.
And because good things come in threes, our third light experience was a gathering of all of the Senior Missionaries from the Arkansas Little Rock mission and attending the light display at the Garvin Gardens Winter Light Festival in Hot Springs, Arkansas. This 210 acre botanical garden and the two-mile walking trail is transformed into a Winter Wonderland. It was breathtaking.
And Not So Good Things Also Come In Threes.....
Memphis has had a violent year. We try to be "situationally aware" as counseled during our MTC training; we watch the news and often see places where we travel and apartment complexes we have been in while ministering to our women on the news being investigated as active crime scenes.
We delight when "new" women come to MyBaby4Me for the first time. We met Irene recently. She is the mother of 8 children ages 1-18 years and is newly pregnant. She was referred to us by a co-worker who has participated in MyBaby4Me. Following the first group meeting she attended, we took a few minutes to talk with her. She said she was a recent widow. Her partner and father of all of their children had gone to visit his sister at her apartment at the end of October. He was concerned about his sister because she hadn't returned his texts or answered his calls. He had 2 of his teenage boys with him as he knocked on his sister's apartment door. Suddenly, a next-door neighbor came out of his apartment with a gun and shot him.....and he died there in front of his boys. Irene found out that she was pregnant about 2 weeks after he died. The story made me weep, which made her weep. She will live every moment of her pregnancy and every day of this child's life with the painful memory of that single violent and unprovoked act. She is strong, continuing as a single parent working hard to take care of her children. She sees this unexpected pregnancy as a blessing. How can we do less?
Kayla and Rashaun Williams and their 1-year-old and six-year-old sons have been a delight to know. They are expecting a baby girl in March. We had the support of an entire ward here in the Memphis Stake to help them furnish their first apartment a few short weeks ago.
On a weekday afternoon recently, Rashaun was at work and Kayla was home with her 2 boys. She heard a disturbance in the parking lot beneath their 3rd floor apartment. She felt an urgency to get her little boys out of their bedroom and into the living room with her. Just as they did that, gunfire erupted in the parking lot. Rashaun told us later that the police found over 50 bullet casings outside in that parking lot. A bullet came through the boy's bedroom wall and lodged in the headboard of one of the beds in their bedroom....a place where they had been playing moments earlier. The family is physically OK, but no longer feel safe in their own home.
And the third occasion to grieve came when one of our women sent the following text:
"Sorry to miss yesterday. I had to be with my family on the passing of my 4 year old baby cousin who accidentally shot his self."
We had seen the story on the news about a 4 year old gaining access to an unsecured gun in his apartment and dying of the gunshot injury.
As we celebrated the holidays, it was impossible to not also carry the grief from each of these experiences.
Santa For the Young/Young at Heart and Those That Made It Happen
Vickie Terry, the NAACP Executive Director here in Memphis, oversees MyBaby4Me efforts and is actively engaged. She attends many of our group meetings, always wants to know the details of our women and their lives and works as an advocate for them in many settings. She has accompanied women in court hearings, transported them, taken then groceries and paid for gas for their cars.
Vickie felt strongly that we should have a Christmas party and provide gifts to all of our current MyBaby4Me participants. We all knew that most of our families would have no gifts for their children without outside support. But this was no small task....the list included over 50 children. Vickie came to MyBaby4Me groups over a couple of weeks and had the women write down their children's names, ages, sizes and Christmas wishes. We set Saturday, December 16th as the date for the party. We secured a black Santa for the event. A member of the church who has professional photography skills offered his services to document the day. We contacted the Stake Leadership in the Memphis and Memphis North Stakes, who further connected us with wards in both stakes to help. We delegated entire families and their wish lists to 8 different wards and asked them to help us choose gifts and wrap them for these children. And then we prayed that each child would receive at least one gift that made their Christmas bright.
The week before the event, Santa's elves (in the Archibald's Honda) drove across the region gathering the generous donations of so many members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. Each trip filled our car to overflowing. Each ward had stories of how fulfilling the wishes of these children had blessed their church members. And we were filled with such gratitude.
The party was a joyful, loud scene with 8 donated bicycles, lots of food, Santa charming babies and children and families leaving with large black garbage sacks stuffed to overflowing with gifts to open on Christmas. We probably violated fire codes with the number of people in a single room. We are now putting together pictures to share back with all those who helped make this happen. We wanted to share some with you. We will never forget this MyBaby4Me Christmas here in Memphis.
MyBaby4Me is GROWING
Our mentor and the church leader most closely connected to MyBaby4Me is Dr. Beheshti. He was our first contact about the project and we remain in close connection. In addition to his active work as an Interventional Radiologist in Little Rock, he has been busy with development work on MyBaby4Me for the future. We are excited that there is another missionary couple who now have their mission call as Coordinators for MyBaby4Me and will launch a parallel project in Nashville on February15th, 2024. There are additional developmental discussions happening in at least 2 other cities in the South....with likely startups happening later in the spring and then in the summer. In addition to these sites, we have actively worked to support a grant application for an opportunity for funding for MyBaby4Me through the state of Tennessee. The Tennessee Strong Families Grant is due on January 5th and contains projections and funding proposals for the next 3 years for work here in Memphis based on our experiences to date. AND the renovations at the NAACP building are progressing; we hope to return to that building for our meetings by February. The commercial kitchen is coming into focus. Our work load will be made easier by being able to be back in the building for our group meetings and being able to have food prepared for our meetings on site.
Closing with a Christmas Miracle
Roeisha came to MyBaby4Me for the first time in early November. Pregnant with her first child, she was living with the family of the father of her baby. She was due with her son on Christmas Day.
As is the case with many of our women, life changes quickly. The father of her baby entered into a different relationship and left his parent's home. Roeisha was asked to leave her current housing by December 15th.....10 days before her due date. We began an intense process of supporting her housing search as her due date rapidly approached. Then her doctor made a decision to induce labor on December 17th. She had no job, no car, no support person in her life, no money, and now no home to bring a newborn home to. We made sure there was a backup plan in place for her that included a hospital social worker referral for a 2 week motel stay following hospital discharge....but felt that was far short of a secure long-term plan for her. She was tearful and depressed. She was admitted to the hospital for her delivery with the layette for her little boy that we provided her in a storage tote and her personal possessions in a second storage tote.
Roeisha gave birth the morning of December 18th to a healthy 6 lb 12 oz little boy.
During the morning of December 20th we were helping with the Missionary Zone Conference when we received a phone call from an agency that we had been working with in Roeisha's behalf. They agreed to take her and would transport her and the baby directly from the hospital to a bedroom of her own in a group home. She would have a stable place for the next few months.....and work with social workers and case managers at the agency to hone her resume, do a job search, get a good job, and qualify for housing which they would help furnish. Tears were shed as we received this news. It seemed a Christmas Miracle. A new mother with a new baby with a home for Christmas.
As we close this year, we are grateful for the chance to serve as called service missionaries in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints in the MyBaby4Me project her in Memphis, TN. We join our testimonies with those across the world of that holy birth in a manger and the example of our Savior, Jesus Christ.
May joy and peace bless your holiday season.
Lynn and Joell Archibald
Elder and Sister Archibald
